by | May 5, 2012

I once heard someone say, you can’t forgive something you don’t understand. That statement has become a very powerful tool in my toolbox. I find in speaking with others, that forgiveness is a huge challenge. It is usually on the top of my list at my workshops, a consistent launching pad. It brings up a lot of emotions for people, and the question that comes up is “how do we forgive?” Yes, it’s challenging when we have been holding on to this emotion so tightly and so dearly. It is a lot to ask, to forgive. But what I love about the statement, “you can’t forgive what you don’t understand,” is that it introduces the flip side, which is you can forgive what you do understand. Yes, you can. We are all equal in the eyes of our creator, but our souls are here for different purposes. We each have lessons to learn, and purposes to fulfill, which by it’s nature makes our beings exactly where they are supposed to be, learning what we are meant to learn in this lifetime. To put it into simple terms, if I came into this world with the knowledge of a fifth grader, and someone expects me to have the knowledge of a graduate student, that person will be very disappointed, as I have the capacity to love and understand at my level, but not the level of a graduate. I may get there in my lifetime, but chances are it is not my purpose to reach that level in this lifetime. I am here to complete fifth grade. Of course this analogy is extremely simplistic, but you get the point. We can forgive what we do understand. That our hearts are here to love, and we each love in different ways, based on what we are taught, our  past-conditioning,  and our soul’s capability at this time. No one is better than another, just different. We are only capable of giving what we have.  It’s like loving someone with a disease, be it alcoholism, anorexia, bi-polar disorder or depression, you understand that they are not their disease, but that is what they are experiencing now, therefore they are capable of loving in the way in which the disease allows.  Forgiving is understanding that we are loving as much as we can, as well as we can, and being lovingly satisfied with that!